A few years ago, my daughter and I adopted a dog, Buba Jin. He’s a fat, lovable little sausage. And he knows how to take up space and ask for the love he needs!
Read on for inspiration on how to do the same. Or, if you’re pressed for time, you can watch my thoughts in this video.
The art of taking up space
If I pause to sit on the couch, Buba Jin is under my arm, asking for a little scratch. If I’m doing yoga, he’s pressed close to whatever limb I’ve got on the mat. He’s got absolutely no shame about placing himself between my daughter and I and offering his belly up to be adored. And he will worship a sunbeam as well as any cat I’ve known.
His boldness got me thinking: What would happen if we asked for love the way he did?
What if we asked for the love we need without shame, without equivocation, just offering ourselves up to the great belly scratchers and sunbeams in our lives?
The beauty of asking for the love you need
I don’t know if she was inspired by our new dog, but my child started doing just that.
And I have to tell you, it’s working.
“Do you want a hug?” They’ll smile. “Then you have to chase me for it!”
“Do you want me to get out of the car?” They’ll giggle. “Then you need to come over here right now and give me a kiss!”
“I’m not getting out of bed until I get cuddles!” they’ll shout down the stairs before school.
My child is practicing taking up the space they need to get the love they want. And she’s not the only one who benefits. Buba Jin and I benefit from all this open love exchange, too.
Creative challenge: Ask for the love you need
Do you need more kisses and cuddles? Would you exchange a hug for a playful chase around the yard?
Be open about your needs and they will be met.
Even if you don’t live with other people or have pets or kids there are other ways you can feel seen and held by friends, the community, your faith group, and your family.
Ask yourself: What do I need to feel loved?
Then, don’t fear taking up space. Ask for what you need.
That’s your challenge this week. Have fun!
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